Review: Cason vs. Viking (Thunders Arena)

Cason vs. Viking is a Thunders Arena match I definitely wanted to see. Two of the hottest guys of the past year. Both big. Both strong. Both gorgeous. And both charming and fun as hell. It could go either way or any way and I'd be happy. Well, any way except maybe this way.

Wait, what?

Yes, I was disappointed in this video (it's not a match). It seems impossible with how perfect these two guys are, but somehow, the sum is less than the parts.

This is what I wanted to see.
This isn't what I did see.

Let me start with the positives. The guys and the gear. Pure perfection. They’re both ripped mega-studs. Cason’s 6’1”/235-lbs. Viking’s 6’6”/260-lbs. Both guys are in skimpy posers. Cason rocks blue with white stars. Viking is stunning in yellow. It’s the right gear for a casual outdoor match by the pool. We get glimpses of their adorable smiles on their handsome faces. All awesome.

Abs of steel. Part 1.

Abs of steel. part 2

All this core work, but it's not
even an ab-centric video.

I knew I was in trouble when the first hint of wrestling didn't start until six minutes in. However, I checked and there were still 14 minutes left. Okay, that’s still a good length of time. However, everything in this video seems only designed to showcase their bodies, rather than any type of competition. There are very few holds and those are mainly a switch back-and-forth type deal with Viking dominating more. There’s no drama. There’s no tension. I’m still not quite sure what the dynamic between them is supposed to be. Are they rivals? Friends? Flirting? Fighting? Don’t know.

The reason I don’t know is that the guys are mostly silent. There's very little talk, which is surprising. These two are usually great talkers. When they're on top, they're usually so freaking cocky. And so, it’s confusing to me why there's no real sense of rivalry here. They come closer to camaraderie during the pose-off, where Viking just mimics the younger stud’s moves like a giant puppy and admires Cason’s perfection by staring and touching.

Once they start getting into the holds, it’s a pretty static affair. By that I mean that most of the holds are stationary. There are no power moves. No movement. Nothing dynamic. You’ll see arm holds, scissors, sleepers and full nelsons. Strangely, these guys spend their early workout on their abs, but it's not even one ab-punishing hold. And when either guy is on top, it's the dullest domination I can remember. You have two powerhouses, but you don’t really see that side of them.

There's a nice smile.

Cason does love to be admired.

Maybe they're not that friendly.

If you are a deep person, you might enjoy this as an avant garde approach to the modern day wrestling video. It's almost a pastiche.

Perhaps the video is meant to frame wrestling against bodybuilding. The musclemen set up their spot, execute the hold then move on. Like circuit training. The idea of no pain, no gain is taken to its absurdist acme as the victim is elevated to the role of hero as he suffers and displays his sculpture-like physique. His pain is our gain. The dominant man is reduced to the de-humanizing role of exercise equipment. The barbell. The machine. The bench. Thus, bodybuilding and wrestling are, in fact, deconstructed to be the same activity, while the power structure of dominant and submissive are subverted.

Or perhaps it is a thoughtful examination of the genre. It takes the essence of nearly naked musclemen struggling for our amusement to an illogical evolution to expose the superficiality of society. The commentary shatters the illusion of what wrestling is. While once upon a time wrestling was rooted in passionate primal conflict, it isn't any longer. We are forced to face the truth: wrestling is now nothing more than the worship of physical perfection.

Wow, powerful stuff.

Unfortunately, I'm not a deep person. I just wanted to see two of Thunders’ biggest, best looking, cockiest hunks in a really good match. I won't lie and say that I wasn't able to find any enjoyment in this. I was, but it’s more like looking at images and using my imagination to add to watch I'm seeing. I had to add cocky dialogue. I had to add tension. I had to add all the elements I expected to see to turn the still images into something interesting.

For me, this is the least appealing way this meeting could've played out. Other than the gear. It's nice. If they meet up again, they'll probably be in squarecuts, so I do appreciate seeing both guys showing up and showing out.

The guys do look great.

The sum is less that the parts.

I wish this moment had been earned a little more.

In the end, this video is a specialty taste. It's not my taste, but it might be yours. It's all about the bodies, chiseled and posed like statues. I do hope these guys meet up again. And if they do, I hope it's in an actual match with power, chemistry, cockiness and dynamism. One that allows them to show off their skills and personalities, instead of just their amazing physiques.

So that's my take. What's yours?

Alex